Sunday, April 29, 2012

Jealousy Ain't So Bad...

Hi, I'm Becky Rassi...and I'm a jealous wife.
Some people might think I should be in a 12 step program.
Yep, I'm THAT jealous.
Luckily, my husband isn't one of those it works out.

The thing is, I think being 'jealous' has gotten a bit of a bad reputation.
Let me explain: I see myself  like God in this area.
*Sorry if you just spit your drink across the room.*

I'm not saying I'm like God in ALL areas, I'm just saying that my a jealous God. (Deuteronomy 4:18)
He wants me to serve NOBODY else - just Him.
This makes COMPLETE sense to me.
I understand how God could get irritated if I started treating other things, like money or my family, as more important than Him. I mean, He MADE me - that's a pretty big deal (and only the TIP of the iceberg of reasons why He deserves my utter devotion.)

So, if God is allowed to be jealous and since He DOESN'T SIN, then I think it's possible for me to be jealous for my husband and NOT SIN. (I'm not talking about insecure jealousy where a wife questions her husband's integrity and jumps to conclusions any time he talks with another woman. I'm pretty sure THAT is sin.)
I'm simply writing about the jealousy that causes protective marital walls to surround a marriage. I want my husband to be on his guard. I want him to avoid being alone with another woman. I want him to be aware of other women  - and that they will WANT him because he is so fabulously hilarious and cute and helpful.
I want him alert. After all, the devil is prowling around like a lonely woman roaring lion seeking whom he can devour. (1 Peter 5:8)

My claws come out when I stand next to my husband and a woman speaks to him without bothering to acknowledge me in any way. I'm that territorial. A woman must approach my husband with a deferential posture. She must be friendly to ME if she wants me to happily allow her to have access to my man. I need to know her intentions. (I am the dominate female after all. My position MUST be respected.)

Sound arrogant? It's not, just ask me.
I would TOTALLY do the same for any other woman. If I must speak to someone's husband, I prefer to get to know his wife first so I can let her know (with my friendly smile and eye contact) that I appreciate her marriage and her role in his life. I want to let her know that I just need some information before I scoot back to my own place: next to MY man.

I actually think our society isn't jealous enough.
Husbands and wives should be on their guards. (Oh yes, this is a two-way street, Clay expects me to have my guard up and doesn't want me rubbing shoulders, or elbows - or any other body part - with other men if it can be avoided.)

Go ahead, tell me we're crazy...and I will tell you that you're right.
We're CRAZY in love (after almost 14 years.)


  1. Becky,
    This is full of wisdom. We should be on guard, husbands and wives, because we're so fallible! I love the image of putting up protective marital walls. Thanks for the post,

  2. Amen sister! Great post and totally agree!! :)

  3. You are not crazy, Becky. This is something my husband and I are vigilant about as well. We make sure to have healthy boundaries up in our relationships with the opposite sex. Marriage is sacred and needs to be protected with ... "jealousy" sometimes. :) Thanks for bringing up this important issue!


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